Courage In Adversity

Growing up in Texas, Ryan Darilek experienced significant trauma and instability. By his late twenties, he was deep in the grip of alcoholism, accumulating multiple driving under the influence (DUI) arrests and facing years in prison. His life had become a cycle of self-destruction—until one day shattered everything and set the stage for his transformation.

November 27, 2015, started as just another day. It became the beginning of a new life. That day, a gunman killed three people and injured nine others at the Planned Parenthood on Centennial Avenue in Colorado Springs. Ryan Darilek was there with Karen, his partner, who was pregnant with their child. He briefly left the building to rent a movie for the evening. When he returned, he found himself in a nightmare. Surveillance footage shows the shooter firing at him seven times from just over 20 feet away. Miraculously, every bullet missed. Ryan ran for his life.

But Karen was still inside. For five agonizing hours, she was trapped with the shooter and fearing the worst. Ryan stood outside, helpless, believing both Karen and their unborn child were gone. The heroism and sacrifice of first responders changed the course of history that day and saved many lives—including Karen’s, Ryan’s, and their unborn son’s. In honor of the police officer who died that day, Garrett Swasey, Ryan and Karen later named their son Jaxson Garrett. “If that day hadn’t happened exactly as it did, Jaxson wouldn’t be here,” Ryan said. “That’s a hard thing to reconcile. But it also made me realize how much I owed to those who gave their lives that day.”

Instead of serving time in prison for his DUIs, Ryan was given the opportunity to complete a rigorous 2½ year DUI Court program. He spent nights in jail while undergoing intensive therapy, working during the day, and attending mandatory recovery programs. “Trauma doesn’t just go away,” Ryan explained. “You have to unpack it, face it, and heal from it. That’s what I did, one painful step at a time.” Through trauma resolution therapy, intensive accountability, and unwavering determination, Ryan overcame addiction and rebuilt his life. He became the youngest Class A General Contractor in Colorado.

Then a client asked him to join the Board of Directors of ComCor, a community corrections program on the brink of collapse. “When I was asked to join the board … I couldn’t say no.”

Drawing from his personal experience as a former client, he helped lead a complete transformation of the organization. In 2023, ComCor rebranded as Embrave and shifted its approach from outdated correctional approaches to trauma-informed care, mental health services, and peer mentorship. Previously, 86% of individuals who completed ComCor’s program were re-arrested within two years. Under Embrave’s new model, that number dropped to 29%.

“Embrave isn’t just an organization,” Ryan said. “It’s a lifeline. It’s proof that when you address the root causes of people’s struggles, you can change the trajectory of their lives.”

Ryan’s success at Embrave led other organizations to seek his guidance, and he soon realized there was an even greater need for systemic change. That’s when he founded COS Collective to help nonprofits, for-profits, and public agencies tackle complex social challenges. “I’ve always loved building things,” Ryan said. “Now, instead of houses and neighborhoods, I’m building opportunities and systems that change lives.”

One of his most meaningful moments of healing happened when his eldest son, Kaden, attended a speaking engagement at the INHERENT Gentlemen Society.

Ryan and his two eldest sons, Kaden and Trenton, had been reunited nearly two years earlier, but Kaden had never heard the full story of what his father had endured. That night, as Ryan stood before the audience and bared his soul, Kaden listened for the first time to the complete truth. “I told him how sorry I was, how much I loved him, and how I had cried myself to sleep thinking of him so many nights.” The moment left the entire room in tears. When Ryan finished speaking, Kaden stood up, walked across the room, embraced his father and said “Dad, I forgave you long before you forgave yourself.’

“The past doesn’t define us,” Ryan said. It refines us. And what we do with that refinement—that’s what truly matters.”